Over the weekend, the hubs and I talked about going out and enlisted my in-laws to care for baby girl while we went and enjoyed a meal together. But...all the while...neither of us could think of a single place we really wanted to go eat. Every time we discussed it, the conversation went south. David is working non-stop on a big deadline and lately, getting my work done and keeping Mila happy throughout the day is what I'm all about.
When I woke up this morning, I asked David where he wanted to eat. No eye contact, strained face. I started to secretly not want to go out. This felt forced. could I NOT want to go out and share a meal with the man I love? HOw could I not want to go out and celebrate our marriage and our little baby? But I didn't want to...and could tell her didn't either. So we scratched our plans and decided to stay home.
Over lunch, I stare at David wondering if our lives have become utterly boring and ridiculous. Was going out to dinner such a chore for us? Were we THAT tired? Despite the busy work schedules and demanding little baby - were we really unable to pull it together? Yep. I followed David into the kitchen. "Are we a terrible married couple?" But before he could answer, I noticed how truly tired he has been for the past few weeks. And I think at the same time, he noticed how tired I am. And I knew right then that we are not a terrible married couple. We are an awesome married couple.
So, Baby, in lieu of a card or a present or a even a yummy meal, please know that I'm amazed. Every single day I'm amazed by hard how you are work for our family. I'm amazed that you relentlessly support me and push me and nag me and love me into being the best Raymee I can be. I'm amazed that you still do it even when I'm not being the best Raymee I can be. I'm amazed that you gave me this beautiful little girl and it amazes me even more how you just know how to be such a good dad. And an amazing husband in so many ways that are not appropriate to mention in a public forum. But just know, from my heart to yours forever, I'm amazed.
Here's to pizza delivery, Thai pick-up or even brownies in bed.
Love and cuddles today and for the next 100 years.
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